How to Reduce Online School Anxiety

Written by: Isabelle Saunders

Kids in school have gotten used to something of an academic bicycle. They’re connected: if they fall, the bicycle comes down with them. They’re given tangible attention and help to right themselves. With the rise of virtual learning, however, has emerged the academic motorboat. Students feel that if they fall, the boat will speed right along without them. The more distant, impersonal nature makes it all too easy to lose track of everything, and for assignments to build up without students even realizing it. This being said, online school anxiety is real and prominent. So, as a parent, how should you help your child stay firmly on the motorboat? And, since they’re bound to slip up at some point, how can you help them back on? 

Help them keep their life structured

One of the biggest things behind virtual learning burnout is the lack of structure that a day without school has brought. A loose day off is nice in moderation, but when it’s every single day, you lose your productivity. 

Remind your child to get dressed in normal clothes, even if they won’t be going anywhere (this actually works wonders for mental health!). 

If possible, help them designate their own workspace (a desk, a table, a spot in their room, etc) and keep it clean, organized, and visually appealing.

Make sure they’re eating- if their school is doing all-day zoom classes, it can be easy for them to forget. By keeping up a regular, healthy diet, they will feel so much better and ready to seize the day.

To the best of your ability, plan the day. If they’re suffering from boredom, have them do activities that they’re able to. For locations more lenient with COVID-19 regulations, this will be far more. If your area is stricter, do your best to add fun and structure to their day at home! Check Pinterest for projects, teach them to cook, get them into reading, start a garden. Anything that makes them happy and passes the time will perk them up considerably. Try not to let them feel like they’re rotting!

If you’re a visual type, draw out a schedule. Have time allotted for homework. Suggest that they install an organizational reminders app on their phone to keep up with their assignments, or look into helping them make a schedule board. 

Reach out to teachers 

If possible, get in touch with their teachers and ask for a written-out assignments list. Treat it like a checklist. Most schools have websites where you can check your child’s grades at any time, and your child can use this to make sure they’re on track. If your child’s school doesn’t have a website like this, ask teachers directly about grades. 

These tips are most helpful for keeping your child on the boat, but what happens when they fall off? 

Be easygoing and understanding 

Your child is under a fair amount of stress, and even as you go about helping them, it’s important that you stay relaxed. If you get onto them, you’re adding excess pressure that will do the opposite of what you’re intending. Remind them to take regular breaks.

Reduce distractions 

If your child needs to make up work they’ve forgotten about, remove things that will slow them down. If you have other children, try not to let them come up to your child and distract them. Don’t have the TV up loud around them or try to talk to them about other things that aren’t immediately important. Music while doing schoolwork, if not actively distracting, is okay. It helps stimulate the brain and make work more enjoyable. 

Help your child stay social

Friends can help your child through so many rough times, especially academically. Suggest to your child that they FaceTime a friend for a study session. Let them joke around and talk when they’re done. This relieves anxiety and can help them learn more effectively with the ease of talking to a friend. 

Above all, remember to be empathetic. Let them know you’re there for them- no one wants to feel alone. 

For more information, check out the links below. 

https://xqsuperschool.org/rethinktogether/parent-remote-learning-tips-resources/

https://education.jhu.edu/2020/04/8tipsforfocus/

Building a Support System for Students

We know that it takes a village to raise a child, but I would argue that the same holds true for shepherding a student through K-12 education – and even beyond. The Heckscher Foundation estimates that there are over nine million youth in the United States without a caring adult in their lives, and while the foundation advocates mentoring specifically from the private sector, I assert that the most effective web of support for a student is three-part: parents, teachers, and a mentor.

 Parents

Parents play the most crucial role in the development of a child – they are the most consistent and long-term relationship the student will have. A parent’s role in their child’s education is to provide the longstanding perspective. Parents can identify their child’s needs and communicate them with the other members of the support system. 

Children also need to feel that their parents are interested in the various aspects of their lives. This means carving out fun family time as well as monitoring the student’s academic performance. If the only message that a child hears from his parent is the berating message “Have you finished your homework?” This will risk creating an uneasy dynamic in the relationship or inducing anxiety that will show its effects in grades or emotional health. 

Nonetheless, parents are well-placed to play the role of the authoritative monitor to keep their children accountable. The limits they set for their children with screen time and curfews can also promote a responsible sense of scheduling, workflow management, and a healthy work-life balance. They also have the luxury of having their relationship with their children evolve over time. 

 Teachers

Although teachers change every year, at six or more hours per day, they are the person a student has the longest daily contact with. Teachers also have the most training out of the three parties and can astutely assess areas in a student’s life to strengthen as well as make recommendations on how to do so. However, while most teachers are competent and well-meaning, the reality is that they are often responsible for more than twenty pupils at any given time and cannot meet the individual needs that a student may have. 

On the other hand, students that show initiative and engagement with the subject matter are rarely turned away. Students having a particularly hard time in a class should set up an individual appointment with the teacher after school or during lunch to discuss the issue, whether it be with the curriculum itself or the modality of evaluation. This proactivity will likely gain extra empathy from the teacher and lead to creative problem solving or accommodations to address their concerns . Ultimately, the teacher is someone that the student has a vested interest in having on their side.

 Mentors

Mentors are the last piece of the puzzle of student success. These mentors could take many forms: tutors, volunteers from the private sector, or coaches. Whatever title that the mentor may have, their niche in the student’s life remains the same; they are neither a peer nor an authoritative figure. This means that the mentor can – and must – build an organic relationship with his mentee all the while providing advice informed by life experience. 

As an academic coach, I often tell my students, “Part of being a good friend is helping you think through the consequences of your actions.” This means that when a student doesn’t invest enough time in their time management, organization, studying, or behavioral problems, I help them draw the line between these causes and their stress, late nights, poor results, and/or punishments. However, a good mentor shouldn’t leave his student in a state of despair by only pointing out the negative but offer practical solutions on improvement for the future. And as with the parents, there must be more of a message being transmitted than, “Do this” and “Don’t do that.” This means taking the time to listen to the student about their day, friends, and interests.

Mentors also provide the student with the advantage of having a relationship tailored to their needs. 

The Network

Student success is facilitated when all the moving pieces of the machine are working in harmony and communicating with each other. Parents should be voicing their child’s needs; teachers should offer their observations and expertise; and mentors should relay relevant information that a student may not feel comfortable sharing with an authoritative figure. Practically, having periodical check-ins with the different parties in person or over email is a good habit to adopt.

The common belief a student needs to have in parents, teachers, and mentors is that they want him to succeed. On top of providing subject support and demanding excellence, a student’s support system must be just that – supportive. The adults must be the student’s biggest cheerleaders and believe in his potential.

Academic success transcends the boundaries of the classroom and the bubbles of a scantron – it requires building an entire environment that is monitoring and addressing a student’s academic and socio-emotional needs from tutoring to mental health. It may take a village, but all the village needs to be is attentive and supportive.

Written by: Coach Daniel Aste